Woo a post.

Okay so tonight I was thinking, all about what Greg had been saying about selfishness at youth on Monday. His message really got to me and I realized that I am way too selfish, I hold back way too much I don't realize who I'm hurting.

I hold back everything I've got, I hardly ever express my feelings and I take too much for granted, for so many years I've left everything cooped up inside of me and hardly ever exerted myself in a manner to show everyone how much of a hypocrite I am. I've never really strived for perfection because I didn't want to stand out, but I heard a quote the other day that most of you have heard, and I realized that by standing out it doesn't make others insecure, it creates a reason for them to step out of mediocrity and closer to perfection. Obviously no one is perfect other than Jesus, but for now I want to be as close to that as possible.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

So I like I said, no one is perfect aside from Jesus, so if I want to be closer to perfection, should I go closer to Jesus? If by stepping up standards, would that bring others closer to perfection, and with Jesus and perfection being one in the same, I'd feel complete by bringing others closer to Jesus.

Act fast

Make a difference

End the on-going battle against world poverty.

Just because the G8 summit meeting is over doesnt mean we've lost the fight, there's way more we can do.

Blah

Not much is new, no more girlfriend, lacrosse started, damper on youth activities, lacrosse team is killing, uhhh, I beat my entire lacrosse team in poker when we were in kamloops. My mom still won't budge for thailand Next year but, Ob-la-di Ob-la-da, life goes on, you know the deal.

Oh and I run on friday for thailand team 05, make pledges to the runners!

Lyrics, and Girl trubs are over.

So I really liked this songs but the lyrics didn't mena much til I read them.
NOBLE STABBINGS!!!- Dillinger Four

You like to stand on the other side
Point and laugh so self-satisfied
Lines drawn so plain and clear to you
So plain and clear they distort your view
Won't be ashamed of the things I've done
Live for myself I can't march to your drum
You were lost to me long ago
Tried to get past your self righteousness
But you kept me below

I am not unforgiving
But I won't take the fall
Let the ashes surround us
I am not gonna crawl through
Broken glass and razor wire
I don't care if yesterday burns
Stoke up the fire

It's like a shot when you realize
Destroying yourself is not a compromise
Cut off your nose to spite your face
There are some things in life
That time can't erase, you know
We all choose paths that we know are wrong
And live with ourselves
When the meaning is gone
It could be you, me, anyone
But I don't need to feel another's under my thumb

In spite of the things you've don'e, you're left with an army of one
In spite of the things you do, there'll be no one left there with you
In spite of the things you want, you will get what you're due

Arghh

I don't know if I worded the last part right, I hate stress, so much worse when it comes back and you are no longer stress free.

Been a while

I've been busy with lacrosse and rugby, I've hung out with some old friends lately too.

Well here I am Stuck between a rock and a hammer, another hit, I'll probably explode. I had such a good day, It was sunny, I skated to school, had rugby and I finally got to go to youth again. It was so good, I got the Oscar for being a girl, but music got me on fire again, I was feeling so close again and I still am.

I came home and watched my favorite movie (The Breakfast Club.) I later, got up and came to the computer, only to find a mildly depressing e-mail.

My girlfriend is at a confusing time and she doesn't know whether she should stay with me, she thinks that I'm losing interest and that I can do better or something. I've tried so hard to get her to believe that she means so much to me, but she can't accept it. I have no Idea what to say, I really just want her to understand. She claims to like me so much and says I mean a lot to her, but she also seems to think it's a one way street. I need your prayers though, and Ideas would be cool too. But thanks anyways ladies and gentlemen. I hope to hear from you.

The Rise and Fall of My Resistance

I had an amazing day, amazing can't even describe it, no word can, any time I try to describe it, It's not good enough, words are diminishing what I want to say.

Well I was up late talking to Mandi, so I slept in until 1030ish, woke up lazed around, I didn't feel like making plans, I just decided to let things roll, ended up going to Marissas, good time there, Goldmember never gets old. After Marissa's I walked up to the lookout at the abby, on my way up there, I was so happy, I had never felt so alive, I couldn't stop talking to God for like an hour. I got to the abby and it started to hail on me, I took my jacket off because I like the rain.

Even without a long sleeve, I felt the warmest I had ever been, looking out at all of the people, seeing them with their jobs, fancy cars, nice houses, and no time to let loose. I sat there, every problem disappeared, every piece of worry vanished, I was invincible. Every word, thought and body movement meant nothing. I could smell trees, see children playing, hear birds chirping, taste every breath I took, and feel the world around me leave. It was as if someone grabbed me and took all of the weight upon my shoulders, and through it away, right off of the cliff, smashing down at the bottom. There it lie, under me, not taking over me, beneath me but out of my reach, no control, but still staying on top.

I lost my grip, dropped everything, and left.

I was right out of it at Tj's, I was way out of the discussion. In no way was it a bad thing, It felt good enough to be there. I'm not sure what it was, but I beat something today, I left something behind at the lookout other then my problems, I feel lighter, almost weightless.

Male Rights Activist

I was Reading In Scott's blog the other day about how he was mad about unjust punishment to men that are "abusers." (IN NO WAY DO I AGREE WITH ABUSE.) So why is it that it's okay for a girl to do whatever she wants but when a guy does one thing wrong, the world falls apart. I noticed today that girls can be cruel, they aren't afraid to dish out the insults and talk about people when they aren't there, but as soon as they hear a negative comment directed to them, they act like they were hit by a bus.

The Names In This Story Were Changed For My Safety. Sally said today "Fat George did it for me." "Who's Fat George?" replied Girlette. "The Fat Kid In The Corner" Sally said. "Oh Yeah He's Ugly Too." said Girlette.

From A Distance Arnold Schwartzinsteroids is building up with anger. "Why Don't you girls stop being such females dogs!?" He Yells in a rage. "You're so willing to dish out insults, but when someone calls you a jerk you get mad." "I don't care what people say about me so why should they care?" Sally Says.

Everyone goes back to their work.

"I can't believe he called be a female dog, honestly who is so mean to do that" says Sally to Girlette. "I know, he's always so mean to us, like we have feelings you know." Girlette replies.

So Really I don't understand how they can be such dinks to guys and expect a loving response. I've pretty much stopped caring about these girls because I've heard them talk about me before and I just don't care.